I hate when I'm out sick for a period of time. One it makes me feel like I'm not pulling my weight but it also makes me feel bad for feeling bad. I don't know if this makes any since to anyone but when I finally figured out how to work I don't like to miss. When I was in my teens I hated to work. I did it for the money but I didn't do it very well. When I hit about 22 I figured out that if I don't work stuff gets turnned off. Now I'm a hard worker or at least I think I am so when I get sick I feel bad for being sick. It's like a strange back way of thinking but you really can't help getting sick. I just wish there was a way to keep my brain from making me feel worse about not going to work. Like today I'm back at work still feel bad but I'm having to say sorry all day for missing work. Maybe one day it will all fix it's self in my head but for today I'll write about it.